Well, the Bulwer-Lytton results are in, and neither Kee nor I placed. *sob*

So I'm going to post my entries here for your enjoyment and horrification.

Drachensson grew up listening to his grandfather’s stories about the good old days, when princes were chivalrous and brave, treasure flowed, and princesses practically grew on trees, but as he got older, he was disappointed to find that as often as not, a prince’s life ambition was to be a tampon, the DOW was taking a beating, and a princess turned out to be no more than a spoiled rich girl with a poodle in her purse and a sex video on the Internet.

Sir William viewed the wasteland before him, the barren expanse, the charred landscape, the blighted countryside, the desolation, the sea of ash—well, you get the drift—and knew he had found the dragon’s cave, but as he prepared to enter its den, he realized he had left his housewarming present back at the castle.